As a queer lady, we notice many stupid situations on a semi-regular basis. I’m constantly happy to teach the honestly fascinated, providing they’re respectful, but many of myths rotating around queer females, lesbians, and bisexuals are grounded on lack of knowledge. The very next time somebody asks you a ludicrous concern concerning your sex, send them to this. It is a handy help guide to get at any time someone tries to degrade an idiotic myth.

1. 
   No, utilizing a dildo doesn’t mean queer ladies crave knob.
   
   We notice this argument many times this helps make me personally need to push dildos within my ears to ensure that There isn’t to hear it again. See, a dildo is certainly not like a penis, not really. Several tend to be formed like penises, but which includes more related to feminine structure than the penis itself. Queer women make use of dildos and vibrators for the same reason right females carry out: they never have exhausted, you can replace the battery packs when they do, and have never problem picking out the clit.
2. 
   No, lesbians are not lesbians because we never came across the proper guy.
   
   Every queer girl I know has heard this insulting declaration, particularly the women that have same-sex relationships. Many of them, like myself personally, spent the required time internet dating males. They never came across ideal man since they, anything like me, had been supposed to be seeking suitable girl nevertheless they don’t realize it yet. Really, I have no desire to continue having sex with dudes just to ensure that “the right choice” isn’t around someplace, awaiting a lesbian to bone him.
3. 
   No, ladies hate ladies because a dude smashed the minds.
   
   Women that come across additional ladies attractive do not do this because we can’t get guys or because we lost a guy or because a guy dumped all of us. Liking girls actually a consolation prize, neither is it a selection. Often, a breakup will make a female open the woman eyes and realize that she’s not happy, but a broken center never ever “turned” any individual homosexual. Lose me with that, kindly.
4. 
   No, we’re not queer as a result of sexual attack or rape.
   
   You cannot generate somebody desire a same-sex commitment. Sexual assault is actually detrimental and complicated, definitely, and that I point out that as a survivor. Too many women are. The thing I experienced had nothing at all to do with my personal appeal toward females, though. Do not look for a scapegoat to describe away all of our sexuality. That ain’t gonna work.
5. 
   No, queer women cannot dislike men.
   
   Perform some queer females hate guys? Most Likely. Could it be because those women are homosexual? Nope. Most lesbians and bisexual women can be completely cool sharing the earth with these bros. We don’t want intercourse along with you, but that hardly means we hate you. In the event that’s how you feel, then your issue probably is along with you.
6. 
   No, certainly us isn’t “the person” additionally the other you’ren’t “the woman.”
   
   Which is some heteronormative BS immediately. Two ladies in a relationship don’t have to end up in alike roles as a normal heterosexual couple. Hell, a guy and a woman in a relationship don’t have to fall under those classes, either. They can be arbitrary and outdated. Two femme women can be in a relationship in the same way effortlessly as two butch women, or one of each. They may also undergo phases. Whom knew?
7. 
   No, lesbians and bisexuals who like butch women can be not straight.
   
   I’m butch, my spouse likes me personally, I’m confident she is maybe not directly. Its an aesthetic, a mindset, an attitude. It’s not penis-envy. Ladies who like women and are generally interested in androgynous or masculine-presenting women nevertheless like ladies, you dig?
8. 
   No, femme queer women can be maybe not confused.
   
   The theory that
   feminine-presenting queer females
   are confused or going right on through a period is ridiculous. The way a female gowns has nothing to do with the woman sexuality. Neither does the girl beauty products. Men and women are frequently astonished my wife is hitched to a woman because she’s very girly, but that’s because she likes to wear makeup products and perform her locks. She additionally wants tits and vagina. Where’s the correlation?
9. 
   No, only a few queer ladies have actually daddy problems.
   
   Really don’t actually get this one, to be honest, but I’ve been asked, since provides each alternate queer lady i understand. It may take place, but it doesn’t constantly, once it does, the paternal dilemmas have nothing to do with sex. If it happened to be the fact, i would like men because my dad could be the bomb.
10. 
    No, the lesbians do not rent U-Hauls to their 2nd dates.
    
    This one can be so silly. It’s form of insulting, too. We wait until the third time. The next big date is kepted for cutting all of our fingernails.
11. 
    No, not absolutely all queer ladies burn our bras.
    
    Frankly, not all of us determine as feminists or revolutionaries. Perform many of us? You bet your own sweet ass we carry out. But to meet a queer woman and immediately think that she’s Gloria Steinem’s long-lost girl is just a bunch of stereotyping bollocks.
12. 
    No, bisexual women do not want to have a threesome along with you.
    
    What is it with people assuming that
    all bisexuals are into threesomes
    , in any event? Bisexual women can be perhaps not sexual add-ons. They just do not occur to satisfy a fantasy or enhance your unfortunate, flagging sexual life. Get a grip.